Earlier this year I dated a man who seemed perfect in every way until one night at a cozy downtown bistro he unleashed a tirade about his ex-girlfriend’s two adopted children.
“Oh, gawd, they were horrible,” he wailed. “I suggested she send them back to Russia.”
He snickered. I cringed.
Most men, but especially a smug childless middle-aged man who has never had to mop up maple syrup from the kitchen floor, can’t fathom the life of a single mom. Lord knows what he would do when he spies Savannah dancing on the coffee table.
He was a trilingual, Harvard-educated banker, so it was tempting to overlook this character flaw. But why suffer when I can post an ad on Match where 1/3 of its members between ages 23-50 are single parents?
The takeaway for me was obvious: Being a “great uncle” or owning a cat doesn’t mean someone is kid-friendly, and it was time to update my Match.com ad.
As I often tell my reluctant single mom friends who gasp when they hear my dating tales, it’s a numbers game, and online sites such as Match.com make it easier – and more fun – than ever to date.
In the last four years, Match.com has seen a 180% increase in single parents joining the site. They’re also they’re launching a series of Stir event happy hours this month just for single parents. (To find out more information or to place an ad go to www.match.com.)
I also advise the newbies, recently separated, soon-to-be-divorced friends entering the dating scene that they need to splurge on a good cut and color, throw out the mom jeans and follow these tips from Match.com’s relationship expert Whitney Casey:
- Go slowly. Hold off until you and your partner are in a solid relationship before introducing him to your kids.
- Only photos of you. Include a mix of headshots, a full body photo, that reflect your interests and activities.
- Remember the three R’s. When writing your ad, keep it real, relevant and recent. Don’t alter photos and the information. Also, periodically update your ad photos and information to insure you’re being included in more searches.
- Be open. Don’t rule out dating someone younger. Who’s to say that someone below the “ideal” age range wouldn’t make the perfect husband, father or dinner date?
Note: This post was sponsored by Match.com